Knock knock

Who's there this time?!

We love all our critters like family ~ maybe a bit too much?

They ALL come knocking, given the chance...

Hennypenny SITS on our doorstep waiting like a dog... (!!!)

Dear Olivia is certainly the worst about always being on the wrong side of the door

In    out    IN   OUT,  again n again n AGAIN.

And um, yes we HAVE a dog door...

But that is now closed due to one too many critter capers 

(nother post needed AGAIN on that story).

It seems that there is an odd order of who gets in first...

Guineas trump chickens, chickens trump cat, cat trumps Beagle, (actually anything trumps dear shy Nick), dogs trump Wilma (goat)  except  "Bert" trumps all as he boldly crashes any and all parties!

No wonder my french doors are always filthy.

It's pretty sad when I have to shoo chickens away to get Nick to stop cowering and come in.
He won't even come near the door. He prefers to wait on the steps. In the sun.

You notice there's no mention of the dirty little short people.

They don't even bother with doors. Only threshholds to zoom through winter, spring, summer or fall.

"Are you kidding me?! YOU don't even live here!!! "
Guess the news has spread...

BTW - speaking of thresh holds, did you know that the supposed origin of that word is from a board used to hold straw (threshings) inside lining the floor in mideaval times? Experts say that's wrong, but...

Seems about right in this homestead.

What a pity they can't read!

I couldn't make this stuff up

 Wish I were creative and just thinkin up tall tales to entertain others...
As my BFF, Lori, has gotten me into saying ~
"Are you KIDDING me?!"

I'm sure by now folks have figured out that our farmhouse is a crazy place.
The chickens.
The goats.
The dogs.
The KIDS!
Enough to scare away any sane person.
I'm known to run screaming out into the fields on occasion when it's all just too much...

But this takes the cake.
Here I am hosting a pony playdate...
(A schoolmate interested in riding lessons has brought her pony to play. Her not crazy mother staying to watch n chat.)
Trying to have house, barn, ring, kids, critters all lookin their best...
It's just insane not possible.
Our inner redneck just seems to have to show itself.

I'm sure this is what I get after busting on someone else yesterday who had colored Chritmas lights up on their rickety porch last night as we drove past...
Lit up.
In August.
I was on the phone w/The Farmer and made some joke 'bout hillbillies...
God was not amused!
Ya know~ "people who live in glass houses..."

After we'd finished riding and carefully groomed n put away the ponies, we came into the house for snacks and a nice civilized mommy chat.
Til we realized that while we thought the kids were outside playing,  someone was upstairs playing.
I cautiously went up and was met by Olivia sliding across the floor as she tried to dash back down.
She's never allowed upstairs...
Was she chasing a chicken or the cat?
Nope all accounted for.

A GROUNDHOG!!!!!
UNDER SARAH'S BED!!!!!!!

Probably the same one that had been up to somethin in the hayloft earlier.
The Farmer quickly created a snare w/some copper pipe n wire. (He's very useful for wildman activities n such!)
Sadly it was acting even crazier than we were - approaching us again when let loose and The Farmer had to shoot it.

Hard to believe too that the sweet, not crazy momma still said nice things and left both daughter and pony here for an overnight!

I guess she figures at least we're not this kinda crazy~ YIKES!

(photo curtesy Google "crazy images")

Puleeeeze, somebody out there...
Has ANYTHING like this ever happened to you?!
Ever? Why me? ALL THE TIME?!
(Clearly we need to order custom $$$ screen doors ~Fast!)

not so funny farm

I told you...
Goats are not my first home invaders.
This happens way too often.
We are not very good at closing doors and have no screen doors b/c all doors in this old house are very odd sizes ~either short or tall w/huge transoms above...
Too many flies n chickens have figured this out.
They seem to learn faster than my kids.

Two years ago we all left to run errands, inadvertently leaving a back door open...
Baby Jack was overdue for a nap, had fallen asleep in the truck and I was trying to quietly rush him to his crib...
I screamed when I hit the upstairs as I thought we'd been robbed/ransacked... ('Member that thought earlier in my housekeeping post? Sadly too common here.)
We have very deep window sills and I use them as shelves/display areas. All sorts of stuff was knocked down n scattered all over the upstairs floors.

Then I saw it.

CHICKEN POOP!

I figured out that a feathered (not quite a) friend had been lost n looking for a way out.
It felt more  like Goldilocks as she'd clearly visited each bedroom...
I cautiously looked around, expecting something to launch at me any second...
Finally I found her.
A Rhode Island Red. They're always the troublemakers!
Nesting in Sarah's wicker hamper.
Due to LBB (life before blogging) I did not set crying baby on floor and take pictures.
Sorry.
Use your imagination.

I will further embarrass myself by adding another icky story...
Shortly after this (Jack was potty trained early) I found little people poopS in the grass by our playset!
Horrified, I asked 4 yo Sarah "WHY???!!!"
After trying to blame Jack, she admitted it just seemed "fun, like camping."
When I called my BFF for comfort she almost wet her pants laughing at me.
"You're the only girl I know whose chickens poop in the house and kids poop outside!"
I hung up and poured a tall glass of wine.

When she came for a visit she brought me the perfect door mat ~
It's worn to bits now.

Country life ain't for sissies.

Keepin' it real

Just in case you didn't get enough of my whining at the end of the horse show...
This is what I came in to find after I'd put the ponies to bed and needed to start dinner!
Scuze the pics, I think I was shaking as I grabbed the camera in disbelief.

The 2 legged kids had been responsible (ya, dumb to even think, I know) for walking Wilma n Bert while I did barn chores.

Good thing they had their blow-up "Super Striker" mallets that they won at the fair!
Take THAT Bert and get outta my house!!!!!

* Apparently the goats are even worse than my chickens bout finding an open door!

** Nobody ever asks me why I drink... ;-0